The fact that media outlets immediately jump to the conclusion that he’s gay not only contributes to the issue of LGBTQ erasure, it also misrepresents what Tom Daley said, which was exactly what he wanted to avoid by making the YouTube video in the first place.
So get your facts straight everyone. Tom made an incredibly courageous decision in coming out and he deserves our support and respect.
Soooooooo this is a call out post about how people are coercively assigning a label to Tom that he never mentions in his video…… That coercively assigns a label to him that he never uses in the video?
Watch the whole thing, he doesn’t use any labels at all and hey news flash! Not everyone is comfortable with the ~catch all term~ queer and you shouldn’t be sticking that label on him unless he uses it himself. Additional news flash: queer is a word that is used to harm and attack a lot of people who are not straight, and just because you want to cry about ~queer erasure~ doesn’t mean it’s ok to call him a “reclaimed” slur. Call yourself whatever you want but fucking stop calling other people slurs in the name of ~reclaiming~ them because it’s fucked up.
Is it wrong for the media to refer to him as gay when he hasn’t said that he is? Yes.
Is it wrong for you to call him queer when he hasn’t said that he is? Also yes.
This is my son, Chester, who is nearly 4. He was invited to his friend Chloe’s birthday party today, the theme was prince and princesses. He asked if he could go as Sleeping Beauty, so I bought him a dress and put a cute little clip in his hair.
We arrived at the party to the following comments from the adults present: “Oh that is just cruel.”
"Why did you make him wear a dress?"
"Poor little man, what’s your mummy playing at?"
"He’s going to hate you when he grows up."
"No way I’d let my son dress like a girl."
The fact is, Chester is almost completely gender neutral. I let him wear what he wants, be it boys or girls clothes, and he plays with whatever toys he likes. This usually involves him holding tea parties while wearing his pink Minnie Mouse top, jeans and a tiara. The guests are more often than not a mixture of Winnie The Pooh characters, dinosaurs, Barbie, Dora and solders, and they’re usually transported in his favorite fire engine.
When my husband arrived at the party later on, he was subjected to endless ridicule from the other dad’s present about how I must keep his balls in my back pocket because otherwise he would have put his foot down and not allowed Chester out like that. Oh, and by the way, our other son dressed as Ariel. When my husband pointed out that the boys were happy, and the mother of the birthday child made a point of saying how wonderful she thought it was that we allowed them freedom of choice and expression, they then stopped talking about it to our faces and started muttering about us behind our backs.
Interestingly enough, not a single child said a word about their choice of costumes, other than to compliment Chester on his new dress.
A boy and a girl run around on the grass at the park. The boy tackles the girl. The girl laughs. She gets up and runs away. She loves to run. He chases, she turns and they grab each other, tumble and land in a pile, giggling. After a few minutes, he tackles her again and she lands a bit hard. She is bigger and physical, but he more than holds his own in roughhousing. She pauses for a second. Then she laughs again; she’s still having fun.
Dad gets his attention, and says, “If she’s not having fun, you have to stop.”
He is two. He needs to hear this now, and so does she. And again, and again, and again, so that like wearing a helmet on the bike it is ingrained.
Biphobia manifests in a number of different ways in the LGBTQ community, where getting into a heterosexual relationship is a form of betrayal. My last girlfriend was an oddity and a curiosity amongst my friends, as if I were the gay best friend she just happened to be dating, and her friends assumed we were dating for the threesomes. Such stigmas and misconceptions around bisexuality are so rampant that I don’t often disclose my sexuality to the partners I date. If I feel comfortable “coming out” to them, sometimes it’s a non-issue, as if I were telling them I had blue eyes. However, it’s more often than not a dealbreaker. A guy I was dating once told me that he “could never date a bi guy,” because he felt like he could never be enough for him. A bi guy would always want something more.
I’ve also heard that bisexuality is a “hippie new age affectation” and a “cheat,” as if you only have to come out halfway — but bisexuals will have to continue coming out for the rest of their lives. They will have to repeatedly explain themselves, which can be exhausting when you have to deal with prejudice both outside your community and from the people you expect to support you. Unfortunately, this won’t be the last time that Gaga will have to remind us that she’s bisexual, fighting for her place in the spectrum. Lady Gaga belongs in the LGBTQ community, waving a flag alongside the rest of us. It’s biphobia that needs to be erased.
I swear to god I will lose my mind if I hear the “sex sells” fallacy one more time. Sex does not sell. If sex sold, we would see penises where we see boobs. Naked men would be on everything that naked women are on. Sex isn’t what they’re selling you. They’re selling you an impossible, pornographically fueled misogynistic idea of the perfect woman.
so what feminists have been saying for years and years is true. women have always been involved in hunting, have been warriors and have made art. women have been inventors and made great discoveries… and women experts are finally breaking through the sexism to get the facts heard.
"But bone analysis revealed the prince holding the lance was actually a 35- to 40-year-old woman, whereas the second skeleton belonged to a man.
Given that, what do archaeologists make of the spear?
"The spear, most likely, was placed as a symbol of union between the two deceased," Mandolesi told Viterbo News 24 on Sept. 26.
Weingarten doesn’t believe the symbol of unity explanation. Instead, she thinks the spear shows the woman’s high status.
Their explanation is “highly unlikely,” Weingarten told LiveScience. “She was buried with it next to her, not him.”
The mix-up highlights just how easily both modern and old biases can color the interpretation of ancient graves.
In this instance, the lifestyles of the ancient Greeks and Romans may have skewed the view of the tomb. Whereas Greek women were cloistered away, Etruscan women, according to Greek historian Theopompus, were more carefree, working out, lounging nude, drinking freely, consorting with many men and raising children who did not know their fathers’ identities.
Instead of using objects found in a grave to interpret the sites, archaeologists should first rely on bone analysis or other sophisticated techniques before rushing to conclusions, Weingarten said.
"Until very recently, and sadly still in some countries, sex determination is based on grave goods. And that, in turn, is based almost entirely on our preconceptions. A clear illustration is jewelry: We associate jewelry with women, but that is nonsense in much of the ancient world," Weingarten said. "Guys liked bling, too.""
hand prints are cave-art signatures…
"This is a surprise, since most archaeologists have assumed it was men who had been making the cave art. One interpretation is that early humans painted animals to influence the presence and fate of real animals that they’d find on their hunt, and it’s widely accepted that it was the men who found and killed dinner.
But a new study indicates that the majority of handprints found near cave art were made by women, based on their overall size and relative lengths of their fingers.
"The assumption that most people made was it had something to do with hunting magic," Penn State archaeologist Dean Snow, who has been scrutinizing hand prints for a decade, told NBC News. The new work challenges the theory that it was mostly men, who hunted, that made those first creative marks.
Another reason we thought it was men all along? Male archeologists from modern society where gender roles are rigid and well-defined — they found the art. “[M]ale archaeologists were doing the work,” Snow said, and it’s possible that “had something to do with it.” “